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Solstice Druids vote ‘leave’
Crowds gathered at Stonehenge to remember the catastrophic immigration policy that led to an influx of Anglo-Saxons during the fifth century. Bringing their European laws and illuminated texts… [read...]
Tagged news satire
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‘Upskirting’ bill supported by every woman in history not ‘will of the people’
Sir Christopher Chope OBE has caused confusion by shouting ‘objection’ to a private member’s bill that would prohibit ‘upskirting’, which presumably has the unanimous support of every single woman in recorded history. Sir Christopher was overheard saying: ‘If God had meant us not take photographs of c$$ts, [read...]
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Africa closes its borders to migrant British bankers
Reports are surfacing that a rescue vessel containing hundreds of staff from British bank branches has been turned away from ports along the North African coastline. [read...]
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Goldilocks admits to further string of burglaries
Following the break-in at a bear household by the ‘choosy’ burglar, police profilers have identified several more crimes easily recognisable by her modus operandi. One couple arrived home to find their house looking like a clothes shop changing room, [read...]
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Glasgow’s School of Art regrets Burns Exhibition
Angus McGowan, curator of the National Robert Burns Archive, had been looking forward to showcasing work at the School of Art, only for the Burns element of the show to get out of hand. Originally celebrating the poet’s hitherto unknown journeys of discovery, [read...]