Payday loan company Wonga has hastily announced plans to diversify and offer unsecured ‘high-cost salvation’ in response to the Archbishop of Canterbury’s recent decision to offer Church of England payday loans.
Posted: Jul 29th, 2014
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The Israeli Knesset has rejected the Gaza peace proposal put forward by US Secretary of State, John Kerry, in favour of a modest 12-hour truce – purposely designed to be long enough for Israeli soldiers to get a good night’s sleep, identify new targets and reload their missiles. A spokesman for Prime Minister Netanyahu has made it clear that what is really needed is a ‘…tabulated program of action to earn public understanding and acceptance’ codenamed ‘Turd Polish’.
Posted: Jul 27th, 2014
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‘This could be the peace breakthrough everyone has been waiting for,’ said one UN observer. With an arm injury netting up to £191,500 for the injured party, the hope is that just the presence of the Claims Direct injury experts in the area will have a highly sobering effect on anyone prepared to lob missiles, grenades or rude and hurtful insults over the fence at their neighbours.
Posted: Jul 27th, 2014
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‘The last guy capable of making smoking appear cool, attractive and generally badass.’
Posted: Jul 26th, 2014
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Beach staff were told to lower the flag and hide it somewhere as the sight of it was an ‘eyesore at odds with the natural beauty’ of the bay. Council staff were said to be disappointed at the ruling, but hoped the move would lead to the beach being designated an EU ‘Flag Free Zone’, and be eligible to display the official pennants.
Posted: Jul 26th, 2014
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