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Posts Tagged ‘news satire’

Pistorius ‘held in contempt’ for rubbish Parker impressions

In a dramatic legal twist today the trial of Oscar Pistorius was halted after the whole proceedings were judged to be ‘frankly taking the piss’.

The case was halted after Pistorius rather over-did the ‘Parker off Thunderbirds’ impressions that he had been coerced into as part of a plea bargain.

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Posted: Apr 17th, 2014
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‘I thought Polonius was an intruder’ Hamlet tells prosecution

The Prince of Denmark has told his murder trial that his future father-in-law, Polonius did not scream or shout as he took his sword and stabbed him through the arras.

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Posted: Apr 17th, 2014
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Ambulance service outsourced to bus and courier companies

arriva-ambulanceHailed as ‘another triumph of public-private partnership’, it was announced that NHS ambulance services are to be outsourced to a joint venture initiative between Arriva Bus and NextDay Couriers.

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Posted: Apr 17th, 2014
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Adoption agencies inundated with middle-class toddlers post ‘Offer Day’

where's the hope?As UK primary schools announce their allocated places, aspiring parents have been forced to make some tough decisions between living with the shame of an infant in an average OFSTED institution or to ‘cut their losses and run’.

Social services have observed a spiked increase in the number of Jacobs and Jemimas left outside orphanages with nothing but a small bowl of couscous, a Boden catalogue and a £20 M&S voucher.

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Posted: Apr 16th, 2014
More from UK News



Simon Cowell’s underpants set to rise 3ft by 2025

Experts at the University of Celebrity Studies say they have discovered a rare human phenomenon that could see Simon Cowell vanish from our screens and engulfed by his own underpants within the next 10 years, possibly sooner.

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Posted: Apr 15th, 2014
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