Nigel Smythe, MP for Littlehampton, is the first to put the Conservative dilemma bluntly: ‘For one half of us, it’s Brexit. For the other half, it’s welfare’ he told a constituency meeting. ‘But unless the party decides exactly what to tear itself apart about, [read...]
‘I don’t care what you call me – Allah, God, Yahweh, Vishnu, the Flying Spaghetti Monster, whatever – It really doesn’t matter because I don’t exist’. [read...]
‘Soon they’d learnt how to drive themselves, even mine their own coal. I had the world’s most efficient railway – but then they got bored’. [read...]
Downing Street had attempted to get doses of the Oxford vaccine labelled with the Union Jack and packaged within a stick of Blackpool rock. [read...]
Following her victory in the House of Commons and a determined resilience against what experts worldwide are calling an acute lack of self-awareness, Theresa May is said to be currently in talks with Netflix over a new Choose Your Own Adventure style TV series. [read...]
