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Posts Tagged ‘news spoof’

Shit parking ‘OK’ with hazard lights says council

Nantwich fire fighters also took to Twitter to retract their initial frustration about not being able to get through to fight a fire at B&M’s, as they made the same error as the council in missing the lights. ‘We always except shit, life threatening parking, but only if the lights are flashing’.

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Posted: Apr 17th, 2015
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ITV sports result spoilers to go 24-7.

TV journalists will be permitted to wander in to make impromptu sporting announcements during any programme on the 24-hour schedule.

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Posted: Apr 17th, 2015
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Man avoids Game of Thrones spoilers by masquerading as PM

as close as you can get to the real thing‘I had reservations at first; I don’t know much about keeping the interest rate from dipping below inflation, but weirdly it doesn’t seem to matter. If someone asks me a question I just say ‘a fair deal for honest, hard-working Britons’ or ‘I have complete faith in Mr Osborne’ and they seem satisfied with that.’

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Posted: Apr 16th, 2015
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New Apple phone has revolutionary ‘non-selfie’ camera

One iPhone user was initially sceptical; ‘When I first heard I was like, ‘Why would anyone want to take a picture was wasn’t like of themselves? But then I was shown a mirror and I was like, whoa, I can take a picture of myself with my phone actually like in the picture. That’s like, whoaaa!’

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Posted: Apr 16th, 2015
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Former school prefect ‘at a loss’ as to how he amounted to nothing

James Blithe sailed through his high school exams in the mid-nineties with moderate effort during a summer of hope, skateboards and the SEGA MegaDrive.

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Posted: Apr 16th, 2015
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