Piers Morgan has been hospitalised after almost drowning in his own bile due to a stunt involving a Greggs’ vegan sausage roll. A BUPA spokesman said that it was an honour to care for the sausage roll in its last moments, [read...]
Ministers were quick to clarify that the Christmas queues for hospital admission, were caused by the draw of resort-like facilities, the mortuary’s ever-popular Santa’s grotto and the fact that rickets is still in vogue. Branding buildings as ‘overcrowded’ failed to take into account that facilities are smaller now, [read...]
The National Health Service today unveiled the long-expected new type 3 diabetes to a packed press conference in Hammersmith, claiming it is the ‘best ever’ version of the disease. Simply referred to as ‘The New Diabetes’, [read...]
For as little as 20p patients will soon be able to shove their head, limb, or genitals into a hole and have a vending machine assess a range of medical conditions. In a bold move to address the crisis in GP services, [read...]
In an impassioned speech from the pokey confines of a nursing home, the ailing NHS hit out about her shocking treatment and labelled her 70th birthday celebrations as ‘a kick in the teeth’. ‘For 70 years I’ve been delivering a free point of care health service to millions of people and what do I get… [read...]
