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Posts Tagged ‘Nick Clegg’

Hard Working Families to be given extra votes

it's all about getting up again tomorrowNow that the entire General Election revolves around glowing generalities, a cross-party committee of MPs has agreed that greater representation should be given to positive, abstract concepts. So with the last day of voter registration looming fast, all spare votes will be distributed among those impossible-to-prove beliefs such as the ‘common good’, ‘patriotism’ and ‘Britain’s Got Talent’.

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Posted: Apr 20th, 2015
More from Politics



Man avoids Game of Thrones spoilers by masquerading as PM

as close as you can get to the real thing‘I had reservations at first; I don’t know much about keeping the interest rate from dipping below inflation, but weirdly it doesn’t seem to matter. If someone asks me a question I just say ‘a fair deal for honest, hard-working Britons’ or ‘I have complete faith in Mr Osborne’ and they seem satisfied with that.’

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Posted: Apr 16th, 2015
More from Arts/Entertainment



Election decided on penalties

Back of the net!  If that's OK with you, Nick?Five spot kicks each were allowed (with only two for the Liberals).  

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Posted: Apr 16th, 2015
More from From The Archives



Hillary Clinton to enter the UK election

Dear Bill...British voters, despairing of the ineptitude of their own politicians, have been buoyed by the news that Hillary Clinton is on the verge of declaring her candidacy for Prime Minister. Up until now many had assumed Mrs Clinton would stick to the Presidential race, but she has been tempted by the rigorous challenge of battling wits with the UK’s best or ‘shooting fish in a barrel’ as it is called.

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Posted: Apr 12th, 2015
More from Politics



Fine weather my doing, say all party leaders

turn out's nice againAs days of unusually warm and sunny weather followed on from the first party leaders’ debate, the leaders themselves have been arguing about who deserves the most credit for it.

‘I arranged for the fair weather to start today,’ said David Cameron. ‘I pledge that the next Conservative government will continue to improve the weather in real terms over the next five years.’ He looked annoyed when George Osborne suggested that he had, in fact, created the ‘right climate’ for the good weather.

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Posted: Apr 7th, 2015
More from Politics