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Posts Tagged ‘Obama’

Obama visits Mandela prison cell: ‘still better than Alton Towers’

‘I’d be hard-pressed to say that it was less enjoyable than joining the tail-end of a four-hour queue for Nemesis, in the rain’

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Posted: Jul 1st, 2013
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Absence of Fergie’s wrath ‘may lead to global cooling, possibly new ice age’

Climatologists across the globe have expressed concern that the retirement of Sir Alex Ferguson will result in temperatures being lowered across the planet. The impact of no-hairdrying on match days and the elimination of daily assaults against the BBC is expected to reduce temperatures by around 15 degrees Celsius and may lead to icebergs forming in the Red Sea.

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Posted: May 10th, 2013
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Donald Trump forms his own militia

vowing to restore democracy his own wayWith US gun sales at a record high following Barack Obama’s re-election, American businessman Donald Trump has confirmed that he’s bought most of them, formed his own constitutional militia, and is planning to overthrow the US government.

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Posted: Nov 12th, 2012
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Camp David fracas as Merkel chins Cameron

Barack Obama was left with a black eye after being caught up in a late night altercation between Angela Merkel and David Cameron following Chelsea’s dramatic win on penalties in the Champions’ League Final.

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Posted: May 21st, 2012
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Massive hippopotamus and teeny little bird hail ‘essential relationship’

can't live without each otherTensions over mindless violence by the king of the macaque monkeys was high on the agenda, as was the persistent threat of a pre-emptive strike by the gazelles against the cheetahs.

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Posted: Mar 18th, 2012
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