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Posts Tagged ‘Piers Morgan’

Britain’s Got Talent to introduce strict ‘no clapping’ rule

'contenders must be shown due respect'A 76-rule code of conduct for ITV1’s Britain’s Got Talent will outlaw the audience from clapping, booing, whistling or whooping. ‘The new rules are very clear,’ said programme creator, Simon Cowell, ‘the audience will sit quietly and listen to the acts with the solemn reverence that they deserve. Even if it is a dancing dog.’

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Posted: Nov 24th, 2015
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Thousands flee England to escape SNP tyranny

No-one can repulse the 'Devils in skirts'There were chaotic scenes across England today as tens of thousands of people fled the country rather than stay and face up to the prospect of the Scottish National Party taking power. The crisis reached a tipping point as today’s Daily Mail front page headline, ‘Scottish Natzis coming to kill your families and drive down house prices’, triggered widespread panic.

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Posted: Apr 21st, 2015
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MythBusters investigate whether masturbation can make you go blind

Adam Savage and Jamie Hyneman, creators of the science entertainment TV show MythBusters, have responded to repeated criticism that they are just overgrown kids playing with toys by investigating more grown-up topics, starting with the sticky topic of whether onanism affects eyesight.

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Posted: Oct 23rd, 2014
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‘Proper celebrity’ funerals to replaced by Twitter

Prompted by the way minor celebrities take to Twitter to announce their sadness at the death of a real celebrity they never met and hope their tweet is reported on TV, the microblogging site is to offer a new celebrity funeral service.

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Posted: Aug 14th, 2014
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Journalists defend right to spout shit with ‘taped-up arsehole selfie’ campaign

Fiona?Hundreds of television journalists have taken photographs of themselves with bands of sticky tape fixed to their anuses.

The images form part of a campaign aimed at telling the world the relentless stream of crap known as ‘rolling news’ must never be stemmed by a return to more traditional journalistic values, such as proportion and relevance.

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Posted: Apr 14th, 2014
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