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Posts Tagged ‘police’

Creationist urges police to charge him despite ‘complete lack of evidence’

God told him to do it, or maybe He didn'tA creationist has confused the whole of the judicial system by insisting the Crown Prosecution Service (CPS) push forward and charge him with ‘threatening behaviour’ despite a complete lack of evidence.

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Posted: Jan 11th, 2014
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Stop & Search to be replaced by Slap n’ Tickle

While the inquest into Mark Duggan’s death may have exonerated officers, the Independent Police Complaints Commission is expected to recommend a radical overhaul of community policing, acts of foreplay and anything involving inflatable fruit. With over 27% of stop and search actions lacking ‘legitimacy’, the Home Office had strongly recommend a more flirtatious approach by law enforcement agencies.

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Posted: Jan 10th, 2014
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Salford man in hiding after admitting he never met Mandela

‘What really brought it home to me was when my cousin Millicent said on Facebook that Mandela had been released from prison on her 18th birthday,’ said ‘Keith’. ‘Once someone has been touched by greatness in that way, it changes them. I realise now the Christmas present I bought for her is totally inadequate.’

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Posted: Dec 9th, 2013
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Police to investigate the point of Peaches Geldof

Her tweet was seen by her 166,000 followers, a number that has left experts totally baffled.

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Posted: Dec 2nd, 2013
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Police to publish e-fit pictures of MP’s missing breasts

The police are to circulate e-fit pictures of images of a pair of breasts allegedly once belonging to a prominent MP which are now the subject of a frantic global search.

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Posted: Oct 18th, 2013
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