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Posts Tagged ‘Politics’

Ed Miliband to communicate purely through medium of mime

answers for everythingLabour leader Ed Miliband has revealed that he will take a vow of silence and convey his political message entirely through the performance art of mime, using his body as a political tool. ‘All the polls show that we do much better when Ed stays quiet,’ explained deputy leader Harriet Harman, ‘he will therefore focus on communicating his ideas through corporeal movement and a variety of facial expressions.’

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Posted: Jan 7th, 2011
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Greenwich Mean Time becomes meaner in 2011 following Government cuts

cuts to last until 2015, or twenty five past eight, as it used to be knownAs the chimes of Big Ben rang out and the cheers of the crowds in Trafalgar Square heralded another New Year, the Government’s little publicised plan to reduce Greenwich Mean Time by 1 minute per hour came into immediate effect.

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Posted: Jan 4th, 2011
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Daily Telegraph in sting by man posing as a government minister

‘We believed the man we were talking to was Vince Cable, the Business Secretary, but it turned out it was this other Vince Cable, who is just a nutty Liberal Democrat politician,’ the paper’s political correspondent Jim Green said.

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Posted: Jan 2nd, 2011
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Cameron to extend time limit for blaming previous government

David Cameron today unveiled plans for new legislation which will double the time limit during which it is acceptable to blame the previous government for the nation’s problems.

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Posted: Dec 16th, 2010
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‘Conscience’ money boxes to be put in Houses of Parliament

Lords and members have been encouraged to ‘take what money they need, according to their consciences’. The boxes will be topped up half-hourly. ‘Now that we have made sleaze a thing of the past,’ said David Cameron, ‘it is time for us to treat Lords and members with the respect they deserve as honest, principled and unselfish people’.

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Posted: Jul 14th, 2010
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