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Posts Tagged ‘Politics’

TV debates to be settled by ‘head punching contests’ say Broadcasters

all in the name of entertainment for the massesTV broadcasters have decided to ditch the debating format trialed in the 2010 election in which leaders debated policy and outlined pledges and will replace it instead with a series of ‘head punching contests’, confirmed Sue Inglish, Head of Political Programming at the BBC.

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Posted: Mar 27th, 2015
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Edinburgh hails sculpture of ‘huge pair of bollocks’ Scotland will have England by

A twenty metre bronze sculpture of a pair of English bollocks will be erected in Edinburgh’s George Square a week before the General Election. ‘The Bollocks We’ve Got England By,’ to give the artwork its full title, will show a pair of Union Jack testicles being painfully squeezed by a hand draped in a St Andrews Cross flag.

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Posted: Mar 26th, 2015
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Miliband rules out installing third kitchen

Ed Miliband has told the BBC that he will not be installing a third kitchen in his North London home. In an interview with BBC deputy political editor James Landale, Miliband said that he felt that two kitchens was enough for all the cooking he wanted to do.

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Posted: Mar 24th, 2015
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Cameron promises not to serve a third term. Voters helpfully rule out a second

his goose is cookedIn an attempt to manage public expectation, the Prime Minister has said he will not be swayed into staying in office, regardless of any mass displays of affection.

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Posted: Mar 23rd, 2015
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Desperate people escaping UKIP campaigners under lorries

‘Our people lived peacefully for many years under our benevolent Lib Dem MP, who showed up on our doorsteps every four years spouting harmless rubbish,’ he explained.

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Posted: Mar 7th, 2015
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