The prestigious Saturday night headlining slot at this year’s Reading Festival has been announced and it’s some group that you know absolutely nothing about, being over the age of 22 and therefore ‘past it’. [read...]
‘A much more precise figure for Jessie’s lesbianism is 93.759%,’ said Professor Edward Simpson of the Institute of Sensual Calculus. [read...]
The music industry has today conceded that the reason all modern songs sound the same is because they ran out of new songs more than a decade ago. [read...]
Pop singer George Michael has announced plans for a brand new string of arrests later this year as part of a 47-incident tour that will see him accompanied to police stations throughout Europe by a symphony orchestra. [read...]
Medical researchers have discovered a vaccine that could eradicate Bieber Fever within a generation, finally silencing the hysterical screams of the condition’s prepubescent female victims. [read...]
