‘My first task is help sex up Mr Cameron’s image,’ explained the septuagenarian pop sensation. ‘To appeal to that all-important female demographic, David is growing a nice pair of mutton chop side burns.’
Posted: Mar 5th, 2012
More from Politics
The music industry has today conceded that the reason all modern songs sound the same is because they ran out of new songs more than a decade ago.
Posted: Dec 14th, 2011
More from News In Brief
Musicians Craig and Charlie Reid were last night charged with aggravated sexual harassment. It is alleged that the Scottish twins had walked 500 miles and then walked 500 more to throw themselves at the feet of Jennifer Davenport, a 28-year-old primary school teacher from Brighton they had become infatuated with.
Posted: Jul 7th, 2011
More from Arts/Entertainment, Celebrity
Pop singer George Michael has announced plans for a brand new string of arrests later this year as part of a 47-incident tour that will see him accompanied to police stations throughout Europe by a symphony orchestra.
‘I felt this was really what I want to do as an artist,’ he told reporters at the Royal Opera House in central London.
Posted: May 12th, 2011
More from Celebrity
Medical researchers have discovered a vaccine that could eradicate Bieber Fever within a generation, finally silencing the hysterical screams of the condition’s prepubescent female victims.
Posted: Mar 8th, 2011
More from News In Brief
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