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Posts Tagged ‘Pope Francis’

Catholic Church ‘evolving’, admits Pope

God only knows...The Catholic Church is changing in ways that neither he nor God can control, Pope Francis confirmed today in front of a synod of cardinals at an extraordinary general meeting in the Vatican.

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Posted: Oct 6th, 2014
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Double Pope beatification abandoned after fits of giggles

It is thought the outbreak began among the higher echelons of priests and worked outwards. Eventually the whole of Vatican Square was in engulfed in laughter.

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Posted: Apr 29th, 2014
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New Pope’s humility ‘getting on everyone’s tits’ admit cardinals

Pope Benedict knew a thing or two about 'performing' The absence of bloated pomp and crazed hubris is allegedly ‘wearing bloody thin’ at the Vatican

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Posted: Apr 27th, 2014
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Vatican Guards find Pope rolling in the aisles

His Holiness Pope Francis was discovered in the early hours of this morning, rolling in the aisles of St Peter’s basilica. The alarm was raised after a nun, on a moonlit vigil, mistakenly heard what she thought to be a drunken vagrant, singing and laughing inside the locked church.

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Posted: Apr 4th, 2014
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Google and Vatican team up to create ‘SoulView’

‘Basically, most internet users are going to Hell,’ said Page. ‘Yes, you, Arthur Bennett of Halifax, searching repeatedly for “hot nurse bending over in short dress”. Or you, Patrick Jenn of Islington, searching for “schoolgirl with big jugs in PE kit”. You people make me sick.’

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Posted: Dec 12th, 2013
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