Pope Francis asks Ex-Pope to stop ‘dropping by’ to hang out
‘It’s always lovely to see you, but, to be honest we’re all really busy here.’
Posted: Nov 10th, 2013
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Posts Tagged ‘Pope’
Bishop confuses ‘the crib’ for ‘da crib’
The Vatican have suspended Franz-Peter Tebartz-van Elst amid fears that he has gone ‘gangsta’ on them. Parishioners attest to hearing the Bishop of Limburg using the ‘n’ word when referring to the Pope, calling his choir boys ‘my bitches’ and ‘bustin out some phat beats’ on the church organ.
Posted: Oct 26th, 2013
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Catholic Church makes early withdrawal from contraception forum
European leaders have failed to reach agreement on a forum at contraception in the Dutch Capital, Den Haag. The event had a mixed reception from the start and was overshadowed by the Vatican representative’s withdrawal just before the climax, uttering a hurried ‘Sorry, I have to shoot’.
Posted: Sep 29th, 2013
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Teenage girls fear Pope Francis will ‘do a Bieber’ at inauguration mass
Thousands of Catholic teenage girls are ‘worried sick’ that Pope Francis will turn up late for his inauguration mass in Rome today.
Posted: Mar 18th, 2013
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Black smoke from Sistine Chapel suggests cardinals smoking ‘some really strong shit’
Practised observers of the papal conclave, which got underway in Rome yesterday, have described the first black smoke to emerge from the Sistine Chapel chimney as ‘thick, potent, and smelling suspiciously of weed’.
Posted: Mar 12th, 2013
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