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Posts Tagged ‘Pope’

Catholic church split over ordination of women paedophiles

nothing even remotely phallocentric going on here‘It seems incredible that only male priests are entrusted with the responsibility of abusing the children in their care.’

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Posted: Jan 16th, 2015
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Double Pope beatification abandoned after fits of giggles

It is thought the outbreak began among the higher echelons of priests and worked outwards. Eventually the whole of Vatican Square was in engulfed in laughter.

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Posted: Apr 29th, 2014
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Pope Francis asks Ex-Pope to stop ‘dropping by’ to hang out

‘It’s always lovely to see you, but, to be honest we’re all really busy here.’

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Posted: Nov 10th, 2013
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Bishop confuses ‘the crib’ for ‘da crib’

The Vatican have suspended Franz-Peter Tebartz-van Elst amid fears that he has gone ‘gangsta’ on them. Parishioners attest to hearing the Bishop of Limburg using the ‘n’ word when referring to the Pope, calling his choir boys ‘my bitches’ and ‘bustin out some phat beats’ on the church organ.

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Posted: Oct 26th, 2013
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Catholic Church makes early withdrawal from contraception forum

European leaders have failed to reach agreement on a forum at contraception in the Dutch Capital, Den Haag. The event had a mixed reception from the start and was overshadowed by the Vatican representative’s withdrawal just before the climax, uttering a hurried ‘Sorry, I have to shoot’.

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Posted: Sep 29th, 2013
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