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Posts Tagged ‘Pope’

Catholic Church makes early withdrawal from contraception forum

European leaders have failed to reach agreement on a forum at contraception in the Dutch Capital, Den Haag. The event had a mixed reception from the start and was overshadowed by the Vatican representative’s withdrawal just before the climax, uttering a hurried ‘Sorry, I have to shoot’.

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Posted: Sep 29th, 2013
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Teenage girls fear Pope Francis will ‘do a Bieber’ at inauguration mass

he's just, like, soooo different to all the other popesThousands of Catholic teenage girls are ‘worried sick’ that Pope Francis will turn up late for his inauguration mass in Rome today.

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Posted: Mar 18th, 2013
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Black smoke from Sistine Chapel suggests cardinals smoking ‘some really strong shit’

chill-out organ music playing in the backgroundPractised observers of the papal conclave, which got underway in Rome yesterday, have described the first black smoke to emerge from the Sistine Chapel chimney as ‘thick, potent, and smelling suspiciously of weed’.

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Posted: Mar 12th, 2013
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Axed Tulisa to replace Cardinal O’Brien on Papal election panel

In the wake of the shock decision by X Factor producers to axe female judge Tulisa Contostavlos from the Show, the Vatican has come to her rescue by inviting her to join the conclave of Cardinals in Vatican City as they start the process to select a new pope.

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Posted: Mar 2nd, 2013
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Stars out in force at this year’s Vatican Awards

and the award for best ecumenical matter goes to....As always, it was the dresses that caused the biggest sensation.

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Posted: Feb 26th, 2013
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