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Posts Tagged ‘Premier League’

Seven minutes to be added at end of Premier League season

At the end of each of the last matches in the Premier league this season, extra time will be played as usual but a further seven minutes will then be added in honour of Sir Alex Ferguson who announced his retirement from Manchester United today.

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Posted: May 8th, 2013
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Premier league footballers corner market in Unicorn Sperm

The craze among top sportsmen for investing in equine-emission-based investment vehicles continued this week, as a consortium of Premier League footballers confirmed they have backed the building of the world’s first Unicorn Sperm Bank.

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Posted: Dec 16th, 2012
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Online football debate ended after fan punctuates opinion with ‘End of.’

Both sides were left with no comeback when maverick newbie, LFC4eva, punctuated his ‘Man U gt mor pens cuz refs r biased innit.’ post with ‘End of.’

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Posted: Apr 23rd, 2012
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Professional footballers eagerly await release of Office Manager 2012

Theo Walcott dreams of nothing but paperclips all day long‘After the drudgery of training, playing, dating beautiful women and being pursued by the paparazzi, it’s great to escape into the world of purchase orders, staff rotas and VAT returns,’ said Theo Walcott. ‘It’s what every young boy dreams of.’

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Posted: Jan 8th, 2012
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Man City to use Tevez as world’s most expensive door stop

if you want the door opening for you, you may have to ask someone elseThe club said that the player will also assume the role of boot cleaner, hot-dog hander-outer and training ground handyman.

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Posted: Oct 29th, 2011
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