NewsBiscuit

The news written by you…

Posts Tagged ‘Pride and Prejudice’

Derbyshire destroyed as romantic hero smoulders that little bit too much

'George Clooney, and now this!' bemoan spinstersAccording to unofficial reports, most of Derbyshire was destroyed by fire yesterday following an incident in the grounds of Pemberley House, near Lambton. It appears that the owner, Mr Fitzwilliam Darcy, a handsome gentleman with a fortune of £9,000 per year began to brood out of control when taking a turn in the gardens with Miss Elizabeth Bennett, the demure yet witty daughter of an impoverished local parson.

‘With hindsight, Mr Darcy was an accident waiting to happen,’ said Commander Ray Walker of the Peak District Fire Brigade. ‘Such was the ardour of his unspoken passion that his breeches had spontaneously combusted several times before. Apparently this once forced him to dive into a lake in the grounds. Several young ladies who witnessed him climb out were later found reduced to ashes and damp petticoats.’

Read more >

Posted: Oct 21st, 2014
More from Arts/Entertainment



Police vow crackdown on Jane Austen ‘coquette’ culture

Police appealing for a bit of common sense, and sensibilityYoung ladies are falling out of assembly rooms at night, a giggling mass of fluttering fans and heaving bosoms in tight corsets.

Read more >

Posted: Nov 9th, 2009
More from Arts/Entertainment, UK News



New ITV adaptation of Pride and Prejudice to be screened over 240 consecutive nights

Leading independent broadcaster ITV has announced a new and exciting interpretation of the classic Jane Austen work to fit in with new broadcasting rules announced by the government yesterday.
The full show will total two hours but will be ‘pithy, punchy and relevant to today’s audience’, and shown in 30 second episodes between all the adverts.

Read more >

Posted: Sep 21st, 2009
More from News In Brief



Great literature to be ‘Twittered’

Jane Austen only allowed 140 charactersPlans are believed to be at an advanced stage for great works of literature to be published on Twitter in a ‘twittered’ form. Sources inside the company say classic books, plays and poems are being pared to the minimum for distribution as ‘tweets’ as part of a new LitTwit service. The service is based on the premise that people no longer have the time these days for reading page after page of long words, particularly when they are so busy on Twitter.

Read more >

Posted: Apr 12th, 2009
More from Science/Technology