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Posts Tagged ‘Prince Philip’

Royal Family to be fracked for shale gas

Exploratory abdominal surgery on the Duke of Edinburgh has exposed gas reserves much ‘bigger than first thought’. The operation, under general anaesthetic, has revealed upwards of 170 trillion cubic feet of natural gas and will pave the way for the licensing to exploit further Royals.

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Posted: Jun 9th, 2013
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Prince Philip ‘showing worrying signs of being back on good form’

‘Unfortunately,’ said psychiatrist Dr Karen Young, ‘the Duke seems to be back to that previous period of robust form when, during a state visit to China, he told a group of British students: ‘If you stay here much longer, you’ll all be slitty-eyed’; or when he told a student who had been trekking in Papua New Guinea:’You managed not to get eaten,then?’

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Posted: Feb 22nd, 2013
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Doctors urge Prince Philip to refrain from ‘Greek’

consortDoctors examining the Duke of Edinburgh in hospital have urged him to practice more conventional forms of intercourse if he is to avoid further bladder infections.

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Posted: Aug 17th, 2012
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UN stands by as Jubilee is inflicted on nation

In possibly the worst case of its kind in history, an entire nation has had a Jubilee inflicted upon it over an extended period while the rest of the world stood by.

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Posted: Jun 4th, 2012
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Cameron assures nation Britain’s gaffe reserves are far from empty

Prime Minister David Cameron today attempted to pour water on Labour’s accusations that Britain’s gaffe reserves are at a dangerously low level after being depleted by the coalition at an unsustainable rate over the last few weeks.

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Posted: Apr 1st, 2012
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