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Posts Tagged ‘Queen’

Queen to auction off some Commonwealth countries

The Queen has been having a clear out and will be putting some of the Commonwealth up for auction, Buckingham Palace has confirmed.

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Posted: Aug 2nd, 2015
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Charles to take gap year before succeeding to throne?

As his succession draws nearer, Prince Charles fears that 66 years may not be enough time preparation for being monarch and is considering taking a year of ‘chilling out’ in some far-flung corner of the Empire beforehand, sleeping till midday in a cheap hostel and smoking skunk.

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Posted: Mar 4th, 2015
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Queen ‘disappointed at lack of rap singers’ in honours list

Buckingham Palace has confirmed that Her Majesty the Queen has expressed dismay that British rap and hip hop singers are almost absent from the New Years Honours list this year. Sir Bob Kerslake, who has drafted the last five lists, stated that Her Majesty said ‘One’s seriously dischuffed’ at the lack of such singers, who she regards as ‘well good’. Sir Bob admitted that he didn’t know any rap singers, however he understood that both Her Majesty and Prince Philip are fans of the genre.

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Posted: Dec 31st, 2014
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Prince Philip admits he may not live to offend everyone

still honing 'classic one-liner' on geriatric Royals‘You’ve got the hearing-impaired, the partially sighted, same-sex this, transgender that… It’s impossible to keep up, but one does one’s best.’

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Posted: Sep 12th, 2014
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Queen requests state burial in Waitrose car park

will consider offers from Lidl‘Her Majesty is keen to reintroduce the medieval tradition of laying monarchs to rest beneath municipal car parks’

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Posted: Sep 3rd, 2014
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