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Posts Tagged ‘Radio 1’

Radio 1 ‘could be replaced by piece of fruit’

BBC’s multimillion pound national pop station could be replaced by a piece of fruit, media experts say. Radio 1, which was Britain’s first pop station ever to broadcast the on air death of a disk jockey from natural causes, said it ‘welcomed the competition from the fruit item, which technology-watchers say is ‘well known’ and ‘not a banana or orange’.

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Posted: Jun 10th, 2015
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Simon Bates and Bruno Brookes to host ‘Facebook Gold’ feed

facebook goldFormer Radio One DJs Simon Bates and Bruno Brookes are the latest addition to the growing roster of bank clerk Colin Taylor’s ‘Facebook Gold’ feed, joining Tony Blackburn and ‘Diddy’ David Hamilton.

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Posted: Oct 25th, 2014
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DLT grope threat linked to skirt length and turning up to work

BBC executives have discovered that there is a direct correlation between hemline and the groping machinations of their former employee. In fact, scientists are convinced that the infamous Unwelcome DLT Syndrome is also caused by chest size, gender and being in the vicinity of a hairy octopus.

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Posted: Sep 27th, 2014
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Radio 1 to downgrade DJs from ‘perverts to crooks’

In what is being seen as another cost-cutting measure by the BBC, their flagship radio station has been forced to curtail expensive ‘extra-curricular activities’ by their presenters and offer more ‘revenue neutral’ illegalities. Staff development with the corporation will now focus on what DJ’s can ‘bring in’ in terms of ‘ill-gotten gains’, including rigging the Top 40 for the benefit of Far Eastern betting syndicates and melting Fearne Cotton down into gold bullion.

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Posted: Feb 25th, 2014
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1970s DJ admits to secret life as celibate monk

Contrary to publicity stories that he lived in a luxury, penthouse, bachelor pad in London’s West End, he walked home (thoughtfully) to the monastery of Total Silence after his early morning show.

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Posted: Aug 18th, 2013
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