NewsBiscuit

The news before it happens…

Posts Tagged ‘rain’

Cameron ‘Sold off UK summer in 2011′

It’s been revealed that David Cameron sold off the British summer 2 years ago to try and pay off some of the national debt. Meteorologists said that explains why we’ve been going straight from a wet spring to autumn for the past 3 years.

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Posted: Jun 13th, 2013
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Smug git with canoe ‘on standby’ after further flood alerts

Residents expressed their fears that 36-year-old Steve Roberts could once again add insult to injury by paddling his occasionally appropriate craft up the High Street like some kind of psychic Popeye.

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Posted: Jul 11th, 2012
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Walsall man forecasts rain for the next two weeks

Mr Watson says he uses traditional methods of reading the weather ‘such as looking out of the window of my bungalow’.

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Posted: Jul 10th, 2012
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An open letter to the weather

‘Dear Weather. It’s sad to see you’re not well at the moment. What’s wrong? Have we done something to upset you? It’s not like you’re ignored; most conversations mention you at some point.’

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Posted: Jun 14th, 2012
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Buy an umbrella – Your handy guide to surviving the drought

Follow our top tips for getting through the drought. Have you considered retaining back-up water stocks in jerry cans in your garage? Or sharing baths and showers – if your partner isn’t in, why not ask around a few of the neighbours?

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Posted: May 3rd, 2012
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