The overlord of an organised criminal gang yesterday announced that due to poor corporate performance and discovery of some questionable business practices, he will be foregoing his annual bonus this year.
Posted: Jun 29th, 2012
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‘We apologize to all those naive customers who, following our recent spate of apologies and promises to do better, may have been misled into thinking we might be embracing honesty and all that stuff.’
Posted: Jun 28th, 2012
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The Royal Bank of Scotland has today come out and apologised for the ‘minor glitch’ in its systems which caused it to almost crumble into bankruptcy and need a multi-billion pound bail-out from every UK taxpayer, with the possible exception of Jimmy Carr.
Posted: Jun 27th, 2012
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‘It’s a very worrying development,’ said a NatWest spokeswoman. ‘Some customers may have got the wrong idea about Sunday’s opening and think we are about to start responding to customer needs which, of course, is simply out of the question.’
Posted: Jun 25th, 2012
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An arab businessman, Mr Abu Dhabi, had a sumptuous dinner at Number 10 Downing Street before being offered a cut price deal on shares in the Royal Bank of Scotland, it has emerged.
Posted: Mar 26th, 2012
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