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Posts Tagged ‘RBS’

Shock as banks are caught doing what they’re best at doing

‘We apologize to all those naive customers who, following our recent spate of apologies and promises to do better, may have been misled into thinking we might be embracing honesty and all that stuff.’

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Posted: Jun 28th, 2012
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RBS say ‘glitch’ that caused credit crunch now fixed

helpful HesterThe Royal Bank of Scotland has today come out and apologised for the ‘minor glitch’ in its systems which caused it to almost crumble into bankruptcy and need a multi-billion pound bail-out from every UK taxpayer, with the possible exception of Jimmy Carr.

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Posted: Jun 27th, 2012
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Fears that Sunday opening may raise customer hopes about banking service

‘It’s a very worrying development,’ said a NatWest spokeswoman. ‘Some customers may have got the wrong idea about Sunday’s opening and think we are about to start responding to customer needs which, of course, is simply out of the question.’

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Posted: Jun 25th, 2012
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Abu Dhabi ‘had dinner at No 10′

tradesmen's entrances all over the placeAn arab businessman, Mr Abu Dhabi, had a sumptuous dinner at Number 10 Downing Street before being offered a cut price deal on shares in the Royal Bank of Scotland, it has emerged.

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Posted: Mar 26th, 2012
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RBS freezes Queen’s bank accounts at Coutts and Co. after Goodwin stripped of Knighthood

Her Majesty brought along an 'n' and defaced their logoThe bank informed Her Majesty that it had no option but to withdraw facilities, and that she could ‘stick her Knighthood right up her big fat Royal corgi’.

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Posted: Jan 31st, 2012
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