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Posts Tagged ‘recruitment’

HR genius devises job advert able to deter all but deluded bullshitters

A team of boffins in a Human Resources lab claims it has created the perfect advert to screen out almost all normal people and attract a 99 per cent pure audience of bullshitters, deluded chancers and would-be Apprentices to Alan Sugar.

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Posted: Aug 2nd, 2013
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Rejected postman lacked ‘professional walking experience’

Royal Mail yesterday denied discrimination after turning down a student for the role of holiday cover postman due to his lack of ‘professional walking experience’.

Mark Pye, studying for an MSc, was left fuming when a 19 year old working for Royal Mail’s recruitment partner told him his CV failed to demonstrated the necessary experience of ‘putting one foot in front of the other whilst holding a bag’.

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Posted: May 16th, 2013
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Education authority seeks to recruit Learning Village Idiot

A local education authority in England has expanded its innovative Learning Village education complex by recruiting a fully-qualified professional moron as its Learning Village Idiot.

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Posted: Feb 5th, 2010
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Gordon Brown ‘not concerned’ after spotting job advert for new prime minister

A Downing Street spokesman has said Gordon Brown is ‘unconcerned’ about the advertisement for a ‘New Prime Minister’ placed in the appointments section of yesterday’s Sunday Times newspaper.

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Posted: Apr 28th, 2009
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Successful author quits rural idyll to pursue dream of recruitment consultancy in Croydon

Iain Cullen always had a dream, a dream his friends and family thought would remain out of his grasp forever. But last year whilst sat in his studio, looking out over the fields of Somerset, with his finished manuscript on his desk, he said to himself; ‘I will not do this anymore; I’m going to follow my dream.’

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Posted: Apr 26th, 2008
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