Mr. Harris became concerned, however, when his son failed to respond to the usual ‘carrot and stick approach’ to his histrionics, ‘Normally, I go and get him a “Wham! Bar”, or a cigarette and he perks right up. Sometimes, I have to threaten that I’ll leave him at Alton Towers again, which usually shuts him up. But when he kept crying, I figured something was really wrong. Plus, after I had curled it into the top corner I noticed his leg was bent the wrong way.’

Ray Holmes, a neighbour and family friend, had been watching the duo battling it out on the hallowed turf and called an ambulance as soon as he could be sure the child was not faking it. ‘To be fair to Steven, it was a full-blooded encounter and it was a 50-50 challenge. It definitely wasn’t a dirty challenge, although the stamp afterwards was probably a little excessive. But once we’d viewed the footage from a local kid who by sheer luck had been happy-slapping an old lady nearby, we decided that there was definite contact! We tried a bit of ‘magic spray’ but it didn’t appear to make the leg any straighter and it certainly didn’t reduce his pain, so an ambulance was the only option.

The paramedics who attended the scene whisked the injured child to the Newcastle General Hospital, but initially had to contend with his reluctance to leave the playing field. ‘When we got there he was rolling around, screaming and bawling. Once we got him on the stretcher and into the vehicle, though, he made a remarkable recovery and tried to get off again! But the white pain he experienced when he tried the ‘Cruyff Turn’ persuaded him otherwise.

The young man is likely to face several weeks on the sidelines, and looks set to miss a number of key games of ‘spot’. In addition, Social services have threatened to place the children into temporary care as this is the second such incident involving Mr. Harris, after his eldest son, 16 year-old Kyle, suffered a concussion following a hostile spell of ‘bodyline’ bowling during an impromptu session of beach cricket.

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‘There is the famous incident of the controversial goal by the Germans that is well documented in these new letters,’ he said. ‘They show that despite the French referee having a good position to spot any offence, his linesman missed half of the advancing German army being clearly offside.’

The incident in Ypres is just one of several contentious decisions made on the day, including the award of a penalty to Army Group Fabeck, even though the corporal who fell in the penalty area was under no challenge from any member of the British IV corps. ‘What is facinating is discovering the names of the soldiers involved. The german Corporal was one Sigmund Klinsmann, while the British sergeant who saved the spot kick was a Daniel Banks.’

It had been hoped that the friendly game on Christmas Day 1914 might offer a peaceful way forward for countries to resolve their rivalries through sport, and that war might be a thing of the past. However, the players were so angry about the dodgy line-call that a fight broke out after the match, all-out hostilities were resumed, and the war carried on for another four years claiming millions of lives.

‘Still, that’s the thing about World Wars,’ said German Chancellor Angela Merkel. ‘It’s not the winning, but the taking part that counts.’

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For a moment fans were unsure that a penalty had been given; so philosophical and supportive were the Manchester City team about the referee’s decision against them. ‘I couldn’t understand it’ said Spurs fan Martin Redwood. ‘I was sure the ref had whistled and pointed to the spot. But Shay Given was applauding the decision without a contemptuous sarcastic expression on his face. City manager Mark Hughes was nodding with acceptance while Steven Ireland was placing the ball on the penalty spot to assist the Spurs striker who was about to score.’

Robbie Keane put the penalty away, with only minutes left to play, destroying Manchester City’s chance of playing in Europe next season, but Mark Hughes didn’t want to question the controversial decision; ‘Well, if the referee said it was a penalty that’s good enough for me’ said the City manager.

After the referee’s bizarre celebration play was resumed, although the ref did have to give one of his linesmen a yellow card, who removed his shirt after successfully calling a particularly difficult offside decision.

Jean Barclay-Barrington wife of Premiership referee Bill Barclay-Barrington said, ‘I don’t know why he does it. He travels all over the country week after week, he’s hated by players, fans sing songs about his alleged self-abuse and managers have to be restrained from hitting him at most games.’

Most referees shrug off such criticism as part of the job, and are able to forget about the game when they are in the company of friends and loved ones. But Bill is treated exactly the same way when he walks in the front door. His wife and kids boo him and shout obscenities at him every time he comes in the room. ‘If he walks past us on the way to the fridge or whatever, we all try and spit at him, swear and make obscene gestures. Last Christmas we had about fifteen of us over for a big family lunch. We got this really offensive chant about him going. In the end he just went upstairs.’

Bill’s parents feel exactly the same way. ‘Look we don’t mind the fact that he is a referee, but it’s just that he’s such a tosser too. He was never really even a pleasant kid, I honestly can’t think of one decent thing to say about him. He has a weird slightly look to him and a funny sheen. And he’s smelly.’

Bill finally went to a professional counsellor who was at first very sympathetic and understanding about his family problems. However when he revealed his occupation, she began booing and shouting angrily before inviting her receptionist in to throw coins and bottles of water at him.

‘It was so rude’ said London taxi driver Dave Howerd. The ref made a difficult call that went against the home team and suddenly one so-called football fan publicly disagreed with him. For goodness sake, the referee is the professional here; what do people in the crowd know?’

Overhearing the snippet of criticism, the referee Graham Poll became upset and demoralised and ran to the tunnel where he bit his lip and fought back the tears. The rest of the 20,000 crowd did their best to encourage him back with chants of ‘You DO know what you’re doing!’ while players from both side spent twenty minutes talking him round and rebuilding his confidence.

Eventually the ref restarted the match and suddenly produced the game of his life. Correct throw-in decisions, accurate off-side calls and unbelievably astute advantage played at key moments; by the end the crowd were on their feet applauding his every judgment. At the end of the match Poll did a lap of honour, carried on the shoulders of the players from both teams to a standing ovation from the crowd. ‘I know we lost today,’ said Fulham manager Chris Coleman, ‘but the result didn’t matter to me. When you witness refereeing genius like that, well you can forgive him for being a little bit temperamental. The players were humbled to be on the same pitch.’

Final Score; Fulham 0 – Wigan 1
Attendance 22,882
Man of the Match; Graham Poll (Referee)

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