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Posts Tagged ‘religion’

God signs for Huddersfield Town

The manager of struggling Championship side Huddersfield Town, Mark Robins, has expressed his delight today at the form of their new signing God.

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Posted: Sep 13th, 2013
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Archbishop ‘embarrassed’ to find Satan is former employee of God

‘Payroll records show that a Mr Lucifer Satan was formerly employed as an angel for Heaven Plc,’ admitted a spokesman for the Archbishop of Canterbury.

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Posted: Jul 29th, 2013
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Thatcher ‘risen from the dead’, claim Thatcherites

immediately forgave Tebbit for forsaking herJust three days after her death, followers of Margaret Thatcher are claiming their leader has come back to life. Unconfirmed reports suggest she has appeared across Britain, still preaching the ‘good news’ of monetarism and a robust fiscal policy, and looking transfigured by the whole death experience.

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Posted: Apr 11th, 2013
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Catholic church split over ordination of women paedophiles

nothing even remotely phallocentric going on hereThe Catholic church is facing the most significant threat to its unity in generations as progressives call on the Vatican to advance the cause of gender equality and allow women paedophiles to be ordained as Catholic priests.

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Posted: Jan 1st, 2013
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God announces end to ‘working in mysterious ways’

The move has been welcomed by some of the Kingdom’s modernisers. ‘Don’t get me wrong: talking snakes, exploding shrubs and having at pharaohs with lots of frogs, all that was really out there. At the time, no other deity was doing that sort of thing. But times and have changed and we need to look forward.’

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Posted: Nov 28th, 2012
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