With a little over a week to go before the games’ opening ceremony, the Pope is to fast-track an application for recognition of the Olympic Flame as a Saint.
Posted: Jul 16th, 2012
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The prayers are to be fired in opposite directions at enormous speeds through the 12 kilometre Prayer Super Collider ring buried deep below Salt Lake City, Utah, in the most ambitious theological experiment since the Pope and the Archbishop of Canterbury met head-on in the Large Hadron Collider.
Posted: Jun 26th, 2012
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Buckingham and Lambeth Palaces have presented a united front over the near-immolation of Stephen Wallace, the chubby Deacon of St Paul’s Cathedral, at the Jubilee Concert yesterday. The Queen apparently mis-read her instructions to light the large Beacon.
Posted: Jun 6th, 2012
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In a surprise turnaround, Grand Ayatollah Ali Hossaini Khamenei has secured his place as the US Republican party’s challenger to Barack Obama in November’s US presidential election, following a decisive primary in Texas.
After a bruising campaign which saw several frontrunners emerge only to fall by the wayside, including Herman Cain, Christine O’Donnell, Rick Perry, Rick Santorum and Mitt Romney, Republican voters were ultimately swayed by Khamenei’s conservative stance on a range of moral issues as well as his soaring rhetoric.
Posted: May 30th, 2012
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God today put out an unexpected press release confirming that rather than being completely omnipotent, holy coverage is actually around 99.3%. This has been attributed to blackspots in some of England’s darker backwaters, including the Mersey Tunnel, London’s Underground and Swindon.
Posted: May 10th, 2012
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