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Posts Tagged ‘royal family’

The Queen rules out second term

Queen Elizabeth II has come out and categorically ruled out a second term at the head of the Monarchy. Having held the post of Head of State and Queen of 16 countries for the last 62 years, she is edging closer to the day her reign ends and she is now saying that when she [...]

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Posted: Mar 28th, 2015
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Nation enthralled as Kate does thing

apparently she's married to thingummy whatsitThe Duchess of Cambridge captivated the national media this morning as she travelled to a place and did a thing.

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Posted: Feb 16th, 2015
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Queen finally honours Stephen Hawking by granting him English accent

His synthesiser was formally re-programmed so that Hawking sounded like he was from his native England and not a cheap 1950s American sci-fi movie.

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Posted: Jan 12th, 2015
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Royal Family finally granted Jennie Bond restraining order

'The name's Bond. Can I have a look in your bin...?'‘We’ve had several run-ins with Jennie over the years for approaching members of the family with a Fisher Price microphone that wasn’t actually connected to anything’.

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Posted: Nov 3rd, 2014
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Prince Philip admits he may not live to offend everyone

still honing 'classic one-liner' on geriatric Royals‘You’ve got the hearing-impaired, the partially sighted, same-sex this, transgender that… It’s impossible to keep up, but one does one’s best.’

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Posted: Sep 12th, 2014
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