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Posts Tagged ‘russia’

UK & US rule out military intervention: Russia actually has WMDs

David Cameron and Barack Obama have today ruled out the possibility of taking any military action in Ukraine, on the grounds that Russia definitely does have Weapons of Mass Destruction. ‘We don’t need to send in Hans Blix to justify anything this time’, explained the Prime Minister.

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Posted: Mar 6th, 2014
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Coalition Olympic legacy ‘not as memorable as Putin’s’

David Cameron is today under pressure to explain why, two years on, the Coalition government has yet to take full advantage of the UK’s Olympic legacy.

Unfavourable comparisons have been drawn after Russia rode the wave of post-Sochi euphoria across the Ukrainian border, deep into the heart of Crimea.

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Posted: Mar 2nd, 2014
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Russian invasion would infringe US/UK copyright

Prime Minister David Cameron has sent a stark warning to the Russian ambassador to London, saying that any military intervention in the Ukraine would be in serious breach of international law, could escalate tensions and would blatantly ‘pinch our idea!’. This sentiment was echoed by the Whitehouse, who claimed that ‘sticking their nose where it doesn’t belong’ is as American as ‘apple pie’, ‘type one diabetes’ and ‘high school massacres’.

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Posted: Mar 1st, 2014
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Russia cuts off email joke supply to Ukraine


The flow of email jokes into Europe has been reduced to a trickle following the ongoing dispute between Russia, the world’s biggest producer of online humour, and the Ukraine, a major transit hub in the email joke network.

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Posted: Feb 28th, 2014
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Winter Olympics ‘Legacy Camps’ await medal-less Russian athletes

Undecorated Russian competitors are to get a second chance at snow-based activities in ‘Olympic Legacy Camps’. In compounds across Siberia, Olympians will be encouraged to take part in new winter sports such as the wheelbarrow, the rock smash, the axe swing, trudging, the mine dash and the 6ft trench, all under the watchful eye of [...]

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Posted: Feb 24th, 2014
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