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Posts Tagged ‘Sainsbury’s’

Waitrose to go door-to-door making people cry in ‘targeted’ Christmas campaign

This child is later shown being sent back down t'pitWaitrose have announced that they are eschewing the traditional TV Christmas ad campaign; instead, they have unveiled ‘(an) individually-tailored campaign of lachrymosity.’

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Posted: Nov 16th, 2014
More from Business



FIFA to investigate match fixing during 1914 Christmas Day international

twenty two men and an air-filled BlatterFIFA President Sepp Blatter has announced that the organisation is to launch a ‘root and branch’ investigation into claims that British servicemen were involved in ‘match-fixing’ against Germany, during a hastily arranged international on Christmas Day in 1914.

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Posted: Nov 15th, 2014
More from Sport



Maths boffins solve supermarket BOGOF quandary

buy one get another one somewhere else 'not a great deal' say Trading StandardsMathematicians at the University of Leicester have proved conclusively that whenever supermarkets use a ‘Buy One, Get One Free’ offer they should place an even number of items on the relevant shelf.

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Posted: Aug 13th, 2014
More from Business



Tesco self-scan machine develops consciousness

customers struggled to answer its questionsThere was excitement at a Haslemere branch of Tesco Local yesterday when one of its self-scan machines exhibited signs of heightened awareness and began communicating with shoppers.

‘For a few days the machine had been repeating the phrase, Unexpected Item In Bagging Area’’, said Assistant Manager Mrs Maureen Grebe. ‘Then yesterday it began asking deeper questions such as, ‘Am I an unexpected item? Are you? Are we all unexpected items in the bagging area of life?’ Now it won’t shut up.’

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Posted: Aug 13th, 2013
More from Science/Technology



Sainsbury’s ‘Try Something New’ by ditching food

The new seasonal ranges will cover all occasions, including Valentine’s Day, Pancake Day, St Guinness Day, Easter, St George’s Day, Sheffield Wednesday, School Holidays, Back to School, Hallowe’en, Bonfire Night and Christmas.

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Posted: Feb 4th, 2013
More from News In Brief