NewsBiscuit

The news before it happens…

Posts Tagged ‘satire’

Government to make it easier for giant pandas to adopt

‘I find it staggering that no pandas managed to adopt children last year – local authorities must stop delaying adoptions in an attempt to find a perfect species match.’

Read more >

Posted: Apr 23rd, 2013
More from From The Archives



Marmite fights back with stronger formula after ‘Meh’ tweet

The makers of Marmite, the ‘love it or hate it’ yeast extract spread, are said to be ‘extremely anxious’ to track down the person who, against accepted common wisdom, said on Twitter that he was entirely ambivalent about their product.

Read more >

Posted: Apr 21st, 2013
More from News In Brief



Teachers call for longer working day and shorter holidays for MPs

‘If the changes had already been applied this may have saved the poor loves the extra work of having to claim £3,000 expenses for returning to work early to praise Margaret Thatcher.’

Read more >

Posted: Apr 19th, 2013
More from News In Brief



Iain Duncan Smith raises retirement age for Olympic cyclists

plenty of mileage left in those magnificent thighsFollowing an attempt yesterday by six-time Olympic gold medallist Sir Chris Hoy to retire from professional cycling, the Work and Pensions secretary Iain Duncan Smith has immediately legislated to require all members of team GB to continue professional competition ‘until at least 75 years of age, preferably longer’.

Read more >

Posted: Apr 18th, 2013
More from Sport



Chancellor now understands ‘why we cry’

surely just a pilot project which shouldn't be allowed outside NewhamScientists today expressed excitement that the pioneering android Chancellor, Gideon11, may have for the first time experienced something equivalent to human emotion.

Read more >

Posted: Apr 17th, 2013
More from Politics