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Posts Tagged ‘satire’

Secret Cliff Richard vault ‘not an urban myth’, warn experts

Reports that Sir Cliff Richard has a secret vault of music to be released after his death ‘may be true’ and not an urban myth, as once believed by music analysts.

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Posted: Mar 23rd, 2015
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Richard III descendants left with massive overdue parking bill

coffin could be clamped until they pay upThe living relatives of Richard III, the last English king to perish in battle, are now faced with a bill of over £100,000 from Leicester City Council for a parking space the monarch occupied for well over five hundred years.

A spokesman for the council said: ‘We don’t care who you are; you can’t avoid Hawkeye Parking Enforcement sensors. Given that Richard arrived at the site about half a millennium before we installed the system, we didn’t clock him arriving, but we saw the whole exhumation thing. He’s been down there for ages. We are fully within our rights to issue parking fines retrospectively, even to those with alleged spinal disabilities.’

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Posted: Mar 22nd, 2015
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Charles Saatchi stolen by art thieves

Nigella consoling herself by rolling around in chocolateThe art world is in crisis today following the theft of art collector Charles Saatchi. Police believe he may have been stolen to order and could already be in the hands of a private collector collector.

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Posted: Mar 22nd, 2015
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Britain’s towns to be given movie-style classifications

a village all the family can enjoyA new government scheme will see many of Britain’s cities, towns and villages of rated in a manner similar to that adopted by the British Board of Film Classification.

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Posted: Mar 18th, 2015
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David Cameron appoints new head of strategy, Englebert Humperdinck

first job is a Strategy for Europe‘My first task is help sex up Mr Cameron’s image,’ explained the septuagenarian pop sensation. ‘To appeal to that all-important female demographic, David is growing a nice pair of mutton chop side burns.’

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Posted: Mar 14th, 2015
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