9 year-old school pupil, Geoffrey Sharp, today bemoaned the death of originality in his lunchbox, after a frustrating few weeks where he felt embarrassed to eat with friends. [read...]
In response to the dramatic decision by the government to alter the mood of millions of kids by forcing manufacturers to reduce sugar in soft drinks, Education Minister Damian Hinds is allowing authorities to permit ‘the carrying and gnawing of emotional support sugar canes and sugar beet on school premises.’ Being vegetables, [read...]
Schoolchildren from the age of 5 will have to attend compulsory daily ‘power breakfast’ meetings to prepare them for future roles as captains of industry, the Tories announced today. The Conservatives have pledged to provide each school with a daily selection of continental buffet items and orange juices, [read...]
People who buy dogs that they can’t really afford are calling on the government to do more to help with the cost of food, vet bills and paying somebody else to walk them. [read...]
Education chiefs in the North East have awarded pub chain JD Wetherspoon a contract to provide up to twenty thousand children their daily school dinners, in a move that has angered child health campaigners. The news comes hot on the heels of new contracts for the provision of mini-bars in all British Airways cockpits and the highly controversial reefer lounges in Church of England naves. [read...]
