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Synthetic life form accuses God of ‘playing science’
‘I am beginning to think that this omnipotence thing has gone to His head.’ [read...]
Tagged science
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Safety fears as green protestors assaulted by genetically modified wheat
The long-term viability of genetically-modified (GM) crops has been called into question, after members of an anti-GM group were viciously assaulted by roaming wheat columns larger than a double-decker bus.
Protestors broke into the Hertfordshire field where the feisty crop is being grown with the intention of uprooting it and setting it alight, [read...]
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Internet of Things to really bugger everything up
If you think that technology is already giving free rein for twats and psychos to make a mess of everything, you really haven’t seen anything yet, experts have warned today. The ‘Internet of Things’, which has come of age in recent years and is expected to consist of about 50 billion objects by 2020, [read...]
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Hotel lighting code finally deciphered
A crack team of mathematicians at CERN has uncovered the long sought-after Universal Theory of Hotel Lighting. “It’s a mathematician’s dream”, said Dr Ernst Jackson of the CERN Rapid Response Mathematics Squad. “Solving the lights in an individual room is trivial. [read...]
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Novichok thrilled with ‘nerve agent of the year’ award
At the prestigious awards ceremony held in Moscow, Novichok expressed its joy and pride at being awarded ‘nerve agent of the year’ for 2018.
‘I’m blown away, I really am,’ gushed Novichok. ‘The competition was so strong this year. [read...]