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Posts Tagged ‘Scotland’

Tories to rebuild Hadrian’s Wall

The Conservatives have announced plans to rebuild Hadrian’s Wall in a massive new infrastructure project that will create up to 100,000 new jobs. Project costs of £50 billion will be met by scrapping the controversial HS2 rail project. The wall is to be modelled on the DMZ that divides North and South Korea and will be renamed the ‘Thatcher parallel’.

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Posted: May 20th, 2015
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Scotland invited to make its bloody mind up

there'll be a gloaming in their roamingsEngland, Wales and Northern Ireland, the other three constituent parts of the Divided Kingdom, have come together to ask Scotland if it wouldn’t mind pouring itself a nice glass of Irn-Bru and sorting its head out once and for all. This follows a referendum last year in which Scotland voted strongly against independence and a general election earlier this month in which it voted overwhelmingly for a party whose sole purpose is to secure independence.

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Posted: May 19th, 2015
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Scotland can set price of Irn Bru, says Prime Minister

Discussions in Edinburgh, described as ‘heated’, between David Cameron and Nicola Sturgeon have led to the first concessions being made: the Scottish Assembly is now able to set the price of Scotland’s unofficial national drink, Irn Bru, north of the border.

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Posted: May 15th, 2015
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Refugees rescued as they attempt to flee Scotland

Around 3,500 English migrants attempting to cross the treacherous waters of the River Tweed back to England in overloaded, ramshackle boats have had to be rescued by the emergency services.

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Posted: May 11th, 2015
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Scottish National Party to launch takeover of UKIP

City analysts have announced that they believe that the SNP will attempt to take over at least one mainstream UK political party in order to expand south of the border, with UKIP being their preferred choice.

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Posted: May 10th, 2015
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