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Posts Tagged ‘Scotland’

Salmond stonewalls Hadrian queries

Amid fears that MPs are gerrymandering the Independence Referendum, stonemasons have begun restoration work to Hadrian’s Wall. As one concerned voter said: ‘They’re lumping us Scots together with the most undesirable parts of England. Who’s even heard of Dudley?’

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Posted: Oct 22nd, 2013
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UK ‘not united or a kingdom’, says EU

‘The Scots hate everyone else, the English hate the Scots, according to Nigel Farage, the Irish hate each other and the Welsh – well, heaven knows what they think at the best of times,’ ruled a Franco-German team of judges. ‘And anyway, you haven’t got a king.’

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Posted: Aug 23rd, 2013
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Regional tension increased by North Britain

no-one really knows what he's up toThe enigmatic leader of North Britain Ai-Lix Sal-Mon has increased diplomatic pressure in the region as he threatens to break all diplomatic relations with the South of the Island.

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Posted: Apr 9th, 2013
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Scottish prospector discovers giant nugget of lard

A prospector from Montrose who found a 25lb nugget of lard washed up on the beach at St.Cyrus says he has sold the delicacy to a local chip restaurant.

Culinary experts say the lard, believed to have come from the wreck of a WWII battle ship, should last the restaurant from anything between 2-3 days if used carefully.

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Posted: Jan 19th, 2013
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‘Midge may have headed south’ warn Strathclyde Police

Police searching for a midge who attacked an Edinburgh man say they think the assailant may have left the Scottish Highlands and could now be operating in the East Devon area.

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Posted: Oct 23rd, 2012
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