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Posts Tagged ‘sepp blatter’

England ready to host 2022 World Cup bribes

The English FA has claimed they are ‘more than ready’ to host the next round of bribes, should the 2022 World Cup location be reconsidered following Sepp Blatter’s resignation.

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Posted: Jun 6th, 2015
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Blatter escapes disguised as the Von Trapps

how do you solve a problem like a Fifa?...Taking inspiration from the Rodgers and Hammerstein musical, the outgoing FIFA president has fled over the Swiss mountains dressed as a Bavarian singing troupe. Resplendent in pigtails and lederhosen, Mr Blatter has escaped an oppressive fascist regime in search of eight-part harmonies and no extradition treaty.

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Posted: Jun 3rd, 2015
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Royal Family ‘corrupt, outdated and in need of reform’, says Blatter

FIFA President Sepp Blatter has called for the British Royal Family to put the interests of the nation first and resign.

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Posted: Jun 1st, 2015
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Election to be settled by penalty shoot-out

FIFA are currently insisting the election be moved to the Middle East and be held on Christmas Day.

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Posted: Apr 27th, 2015
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Christmas to be moved to accommodate Qatar World Cup

a gift from Santa BlatterRepresentatives of Europe’s biggest Christian groups had said that they were against a winter World Cup on the grounds that it would overshadow the build up to the annual festival, popular for about the last 2000 years, but FIFA President Sepp Blatter argued ‘Compromises will need to be made. There’s no reason why a religious festival celebrated by millions around the world shouldn’t be moved.’

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Posted: Feb 24th, 2015
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