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Posts Tagged ‘spoof news’

No point arguing with you in this mood, FA tells England Lionesses

The Football Association has defended itself over the furore about its allegedly sexist tweet about the return of the England Lionesses team from the Womens’ World Cup. It has accused critics of ‘completely overreacting, as usual’ and declaring that ‘it’s no use arguing with you when you’re in this kind of mood’.

The tweet, which welcomed the Lionesses back as ‘mothers, partners and daughters’, has caused outrage among fans of the team, which enjoyed the most success of any England team in a World Cup since 1966. The FA has responded by deleting the offending message, replacing it with ‘Fine, have it your way… #cantbloodywincanI’ but strongly denied that it is an inherently sexist organisation.

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Posted: Jul 7th, 2015
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Swingers’ festival ‘used loud music to drown sounds of bonking’

Despite complaints from local residents about noise levels, organisers of the Swingfields festival in the Forest of Dean have insisted that their blaring disco music was turned up loud as a courtesy to locals, because it was ‘better than the sound of constant squelching’.

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Posted: Jul 7th, 2015
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Rich ‘keeping their fingers crossed’ on budget

As George Osborne finalises his first budget unencumbered by a coalition cabinet, some of the country’s richest people are nervously awaiting the result after five years of hardship in which they had to move large amounts of their wealth offshore.

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Posted: Jul 7th, 2015
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Wimbledon Ladies’ Prettiness Championship enters tense final stages

men's final on Sunday Phworr, she should definitely make the semis

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Posted: Jul 7th, 2015
More from From The Archives



Friends of missing Luton family ‘dreading the Christmas newsletter’

Friends and relatives of the family who have joined Islamic State after disappearing in May, say they expect this year’s Christmas newsletter to ‘even more insufferably smug and tedious than usual, if that’s possible.’

The twelve-strong Mannan family from Luton have not been seen since they visited their home nation of Bangladesh earlier this year. Now those close to the Mannans fear the worst: a lengthy mass-mailed screed of anti-Western hatred, mixed with interminable details of their educational and career highlights over the last twelve months.

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Posted: Jul 6th, 2015
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