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Posts Tagged ‘spoof news’

Nigel Farage seeks TV debate in bikinis with Daily Mail’s Paul Dacre

could increase the Daily Mail's circulation if he had a column Paul Dacre ‘must also turn up in skimpy, alluring swimwear’

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Posted: Apr 23rd, 2015
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Miliband dubsteps into the future with style tips from Skrillex

down wiv da kidz, innit, to winnitIn an attempt to appeal to the ‘yoof’ vote, Labour leader Ed Miliband has enlisted the help of well know young person and bass-dropper Skrillex.

Best known for making dance tracks out of that that noise your washing machine keeps making mid-cycle, Skrillex will accompany the opposition leader around the country advising him on matters of style, dress and appropriate use of hashtags.

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Posted: Apr 23rd, 2015
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Kurt Cobain ‘invented bottomless barrel’

Long-deceased musician Kurt Cobain’s greatest achievement was the invention of the bottomless barrel, it has been revealed. After the unearthing of a home-made Cobain recording of the Beatles hit ‘And I Love Her’, archive specialist John Morgan said: ‘Every time we think we’re at the bottom of it, we discover yet another previously hidden depth.’

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Posted: Apr 23rd, 2015
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Shock as window cleaner posts annual loss of nearly £700

George Kerr, a 68-year-old window cleaner from Birmingham, has stunned friends, family and City analysts by reporting a loss of £693 for the financial year ending 5th April 2015. Fears are growing that this may not be the only disappointing set of annual results in the self-employed trading sector.

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Posted: Apr 23rd, 2015
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Libyan cruise company offers ‘no-frills’ cruise to Italy

desperate to get to a better form of corruptionWith the strapline ‘See Naples and die…before you get there’, one Tripoli-based cruise company is reporting a bumper season by tempting hundreds of African tourists to take up the offer of no-frills trips part of the way to the Sicilian coast.

With five questionably seaworthy vessels and a fully refurbished, century-old dhow in its fleet, ‘Ahmed is Your Med Tours’ offers exclusive one-way trips to Sicily and whatever Mediterranean port it can find without the unnecessary expense of fuel or a rudder.

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Posted: Apr 22nd, 2015
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