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Posts Tagged ‘spoof news’

Katie Price to open second vagina

Katie Price, owner of the celebrity world’s busiest vagina, has announced plans for an additional vagina to help cope with the demand on her existing front bottom. Vagina2, as it will be known, will be situated to the north of vagina1 and is expected to serve up to half a million passengers a year, almost double that of vagina1.

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Posted: Oct 20th, 2014
More from News In Brief



House of Commons ‘black-eyed babbling ghoul’ turns out to be Ed Miliband

The Phantom of the Parliament. 'A shadow of himself...'Former Home Secretary Johnson Alan Johnson revealed today that the spectral, black-eyed ‘lost soul’ seen haunting the corridors of the Palace of Westminster over the last few months is, in fact, Labour Party leader Ed Miliband.

‘Increasing sightings of this tragic apparition meandering through Westminster, engaging in animated conversations with portraits of Prime Ministers on the walls, had sparked much speculation that the poor creature is searching for something,’ said Johnson. ‘A policy – or a miracle, probably.’

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Posted: Oct 19th, 2014
More from Politics



Nominations for 2015 spring uprising due in

phone lines are now openThe United Nations applications deadline for the next country or countries to host a popular uprising expires today, with a wide field of candidates vying for the coveted spring 2015 slot.

‘The annual spring uprising has become an international event,’ said Lars Hofmeister, head of UN peacekeeping operations. ‘The list of applicants this year was likely to be longer than ever,’ he said, ‘with around 30 to 40 nations all bidding for the right to hold a destabilising and potentially violent revolution to cause problems for or even overthrow an existing government.

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Posted: Oct 16th, 2014
More from World News



New iPad ‘easiest to bend yet!’ claims Apple

Let the competition match that!

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Posted: Oct 16th, 2014
More from Left Alert



Commuter violently tarred and feathered after taking phone call in Quiet Carriage

victim can't say he wasn't warnedCommuter Darren Watson, 31, was viciously attacked yesterday by fellow passengers on the 07.18 Virgin Trains service to London.

‘The journey started pleasantly enough’, said Darren. ‘People were reading copies of Librarian Monthly or working on spreadsheets. I hadn’t even realised I was in the Quiet Coach until it all kicked off.’

‘It wasn’t even much of a call, just my wife phoning to ask what I wanted for my tea. When I looked up, all these people had risen from their seats. Some were wearing bandanas, and an accountant from Preston was stripping to the waist and smearing camouflage paint on his cheeks. They didn’t make a sound, just used hand signals like in films.’

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Posted: Oct 15th, 2014
More from UK News