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‘No safe limit’ for pizza
Chief Medical Officer Dame Sally Davies, 66, shocked the UK’s population with the announcement today that there is no safe consumption level for pizza. [read...]
Tagged spoof
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New government rule states voters have to be recognised by Laura Kuenssberg
‘We considered insisting on photo ID, but apparently anybody can take a photo these days,’ said a government advisor. [read...]
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Melanie Phillips appointed as Middle East peace envoy
‘Just because she goes on TV saying 1.6 billion Muslims are trying to murder the rest of the world, doesn’t mean she doesn’t have a sense of humour.’ [read...]
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Taylor Swift blasts ‘toxic male privilege’, as worst band name ever
She further criticised the ‘patriarchy of time’ (a concept album by ‘Yes’) and ‘a lack of female empowerment’ – a 90’s twelve-inch by Toris Amos. [read...]
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Labour Party ‘determined to find less popular leader’
Current front runners include Harvey Weinstien, Mr. Burns from The Simpsons, or the inventor of South West Train’s plastic milk sachet. [read...]