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Posts Tagged ‘Star Wars’

Darth Vader ‘gutted’ Jeremy Corbyn has forgotten him

‘He holidayed on the Death Star, I let him destroy a planet’, sobbed Lord Vader. ‘He even asked if I could lend it him to deal with a ‘pesky’ nation he was bothered about. I’ll vote Tory next time – they never forget a friendly tyrant.’

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Posted: Aug 20th, 2015
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Fathers unable to bond with their kids without shared Star Wars knowledge

A study of young parents has revealed that new fathers are unable to relate to their children without a shared knowledge of the Star Wars universe.

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Posted: Apr 29th, 2015
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Miliband: ‘I will pass law to make collecting Star Wars figures compulsory’

Ed Miliband, leader of the opposition and life-long Jedi commander has stated that if he becomes Prime Minister, he will make collection of Star Wars figures non-optional.

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Posted: Mar 9th, 2015
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Darth Vader seeks revenge by ‘living well’

Lord of the Sith Darth Vader has warned his sworn enemies that he will be unleashing revenge in its most ruthless form, simply by living well. The Dark Emperor threatened a low carb gluten free diet, regular exercise, and a vengeful appetite for Alpen Swiss Style Muesli.

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Posted: Dec 22nd, 2014
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Stephen Hawking gets Darth Vader voice synthesizer

Stephen Hawking was back in the media spotlight again this week with the announcement that he was getting a new voice synthesizer based on the Star Wars villain Darth Vader.

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Posted: Dec 7th, 2014
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