Jim Nelson, an office worker in Farringdon, decided against placing his usual Starbucks order of creamy Mocha Hazelnut Frappuccino plus a giant Smarties cookie as part of a desperate attempt to impress the coffee shop’s new 23-year-old employee whom he described as ‘the heart-stopping girl of my dreams’.
Posted: Sep 25th, 2012
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Tiresome prick, Dave Henderson, finally got round to pestering staff at his local outlet, who have absolutely no say whatsoever on corporate policy, with a twattish fake name yesterday.
Posted: Apr 26th, 2012
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A Woking man who used a loyalty card to obtain discount cups of coffee from his local Costa coffee shop has been branded a ‘shameless coffee whore’ by store manager Brad Fuller after being spotted drinking coffee in a rival coffee house.
Posted: Mar 16th, 2012
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‘I’d begun noticing that everywhere I went there was a Costa,’ said James Hendred, the surprised new franchisee. ‘So when they wanted customer feedback I asked rhetorically, ‘Why don’t you just build a café in my house?’ I didn’t think they’d take it seriously.’
An anti-capitalist protester camping outside St Paul’s Cathedral in London confirmed today that the experience has inspired him to start ‘ProtestEx’ – the world’s first event management company dedicated to ‘making sure your bid to overthrow the status quo goes without a hitch’.
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