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Posts Tagged ‘Stephen Hester’

2000 slaves to be buried alongside RBS Pharaoh

now focussing solely on pyramid schemesWith full support from his advisors in his boardroom, Stephen Hester, or King Tut Tut the Third of RBS, has decreed that 2,000 former servants from the bank’s investment arm be slaughtered and buried alongside him in a specially designed pyramid, with a wall separating them from his own tomb, his severance pay and benefits worth £1.6m, another £4m in shares and what’s left over from all those other bonuses.

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Posted: Jun 14th, 2013
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RBS ‘regrets’ investing in financial software from Fisher-Price

looking for new, more influential sponsor. like BarclaysRBS executives have acknowledged that purchasing their software and systems from Fisher-Price may have been a cost-cutting exercise too far.

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Posted: Mar 8th, 2013
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RBS say ‘glitch’ that caused credit crunch now fixed

helpful HesterThe Royal Bank of Scotland has today come out and apologised for the ‘minor glitch’ in its systems which caused it to almost crumble into bankruptcy and need a multi-billion pound bail-out from every UK taxpayer, with the possible exception of Jimmy Carr.

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Posted: Jun 27th, 2012
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