During an ad-break while watching the movie ‘Miracle on 34th Street’ – televised for the sixty-seventh time this month – it was revealed to Jesus Christ that when it comes to the modern-day Christmas, “Morrisons makes it”, [read...]
Staff at the Department for Exiting the EU are reported to be hungry and irritable as the staff member sent to Tesco to get lunch still hasn’t returned after three months, being embroiled in complex negotiations with the automated checkout. [read...]
Supermarket checkout workers have urged shoppers to stop using bags for life from other stores as they find it too upsetting. Susan Robertson, who has worked at Asda for more than ten years, said she had been reduced to tears at seeing Sainsbury’s and Morrisons bags used at her till. [read...]
A supermarket checkout cashier is much quicker at scanning items through the electronic point of sale technology than you could ever hope to pack them, and there’s absolutely no point in trying to keep up, [read...]
There was excitement at a Haslemere branch of Tesco Local yesterday when one of its self-scan machines exhibited signs of heightened awareness and began communicating with shoppers.
‘For a few days the machine had been repeating the phrase, [read...]
