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Posts Tagged ‘Syria’

Fans want Hans Blix to tour ‘one last time’

An online campaign has begun to persuade the once great ‘weapons inspector’ and hugely talented musician, Hans Blix, to return for a final, farewell gig in Syria.

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Posted: Aug 29th, 2013
More from News In Brief



Assad condemns fitness levels after ‘sudden outbreak of asthma’ among Syrians

a massive bombardment of salbutamol should sort itSyrian President Bashar al-Assad has told the world’s media that he ‘will not rest’ until residents of Damascus commit to the sort of physical exercise regime that would prevent them succumbing to the sudden bouts of asthma captured on news footage last week.

‘I am sure the whole world will join me in condemning the irresponsible lifestyle choices of my subjects,’ said President Assad today. ‘Gasping for breath, clawing at your face, even suddenly falling down and dying – any doctor will tell you that this is the fate that befalls you if you don’t partake in regular aerobic exercise. It is a sobering lesson for Syria, but we will learn from it and move on.’

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Posted: Aug 27th, 2013
More from World News



Obama lists further coloured lines the Syrians must not cross

Following his administration’s assessment that Syria’s government has almost certainly used chemical weapons and so crossed the ‘red line’ President Obama set out last year, the White house has today announced a series of new lines in different colours and urged Syria not to cross them either.

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Posted: Aug 27th, 2013
More from News In Brief



Britain to send arms to ‘Murder Dem Batty Boy’ gang in bid to end the war on drugs

move criticised by rival Lib Dem Batty BoyzBritain is to extend its policy of arms dealer diplomacy to its own War on Drugs, in a move that will see Cruise Missiles supplied to the Murder Dem Batty Boys gang in Croydon.

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Posted: Jun 5th, 2013
More from UK News



UN finally intervenes in Syria, awards prize to ‘one millionth refugee’

never in his wildest dream did he think he would win, or surviveThe West finally made a positive intervention in the ongoing conflict which is devastating Syria by awarding a brand new Nissan Micra to the one millionth Syrian to cross the border into neighbouring states in the search for safety.

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Posted: Mar 6th, 2013
More from World News