Health Minister Jeremy Hunt has calculated that the NHS could save billions if it operated as a computer model, like the Matrix, instead of as a real-world service trying to treat sick people in 3D.
Posted: Oct 18th, 2014
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Apple has claimed that the all-new iPhone 6 will take ‘the best and most easily leaked nudie photos yet’, during yesterday’s glitzy launch in California.
Posted: Sep 11th, 2014
More from News In Brief
Driverless cars won’t be allowed on Britain’s roads until they have passed their test, said a spokesman for the Department of Transport. And in the latest setback to the rapid introduction of the high-tech vehicles, it was revealed that the cars would not be allowed to apply for their test until they are at least 17-years-old and covered in acne. This could delay their introduction until 2031.
Posted: Aug 5th, 2014
More from News In Brief
Already weary of dismal stand-up comedians and armchair satirists alike milking ‘dicks on car phone’ jokes, the newly merged Dixons Carphone company has hit back by announcing their new signature range of in-car communications will be branded ‘FannyCock’.
Head of Marketing Theo Holtom proudly said, ‘FannyCock is already a runaway success with pre-orders outstripping capacity, particularly in Thailand and Austria, oddly. We have been asked to bring out a range of phones and tablets for business users so jaded executives can say ‘Ya I’m on the FannyCock today, send me your spreadsheets and I’ll look at them on that’.
Posted: May 18th, 2014
More from Business
Grandmother Margaret Edwards has another thirty-six sleepless nights to endure before Christmas Day when she fears her family will be giving her an iPad as a Christmas present.
Posted: Nov 18th, 2013
More from News In Brief
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