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Posts Tagged ‘terrorism’

European Court rules God cannot cast Lucifer out of Heaven

The omnipresent supreme being, God, has expressed his disappointment after the European Court refused to overturn a ruling preventing him from casting out the senior radical anticleric Lucifer, commonly known as Satan, from Heaven.

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Posted: Apr 26th, 2013
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Northern Ireland Tourist Board declares inaugural Flag Day a runaway success

The Discover Northern Ireland website has announced plans to make national Flag Day an annual fixture in the country’s social calendar following the runaway success of this year’s event.

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Posted: Jan 13th, 2013
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Commuter outrage as terrorist attempts to blow himself up on Quiet Carriage

commuters led away by loved ones to safely finish the final chapters‘I told him: ‘Young man, I am trying to read The Time Traveler’s Wife, and this brouhaha is not helping one little bit’.’

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Posted: Jan 4th, 2013
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Middle East crisis solved on Twitter

Netanyahu still hasn't been toldThere were jubilant scenes across the Middle East last night, as the bitter dispute between Israel and its Arab neighbours finally ended, thanks to a series of Tweets from two individuals on opposite sides of the argument.

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Posted: Dec 7th, 2012
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Intelligence service fears that Round Robin writers may develop Twitter capacity

Christmas Round Robin writers may have learned mass demoralisation techniques that can be deployed any time of the year, security chiefs have warned.

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Posted: Dec 3rd, 2012
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