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Posts Tagged ‘terrorism’

UK troops leave Afghanistan never to return, probably

The union flag was lowered at Camp Bastion and ceremoniously packed away, until it is required to be raised again at Camp Bastion by the next US President.

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Posted: Oct 28th, 2014
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Salad dressing marketeer set to withdraw from Hellmans

A specialist food marketeer has pulled out of Hellmans, ten years to the day after arriving to provide practical and strategic support for the company and its staff.

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Posted: Oct 28th, 2014
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Poshmerga forces take Harrogate. Declare balsamic law.

After a day of heavy fighting, the new middle-class terror group has proclaimed itself ruler of Harrogate, Ripon and Knaresborough. A ‘Poshmerga’ spokesperson, identified only as ‘Debbie from Marketing’ said they were now consolidating their position, but a column of Range Rovers was observed this afternoon, headed towards Skipton.

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Posted: Sep 4th, 2014
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Dropping box-sets of ‘Fame’ on jihadists ‘last desperate throw of dice’ admits US

fame costs... and here's where you start payingThe Pentagon has revealed that US military planes have dropped box-sets of 80′s TV series ‘Fame’ in areas of Iraq currently controlled by Islamic militants. The move is seen as a daring attempt to soften the jihadist’s hard-line approach and move the fighting away from fundamentalist savagery to a more danced-based conflict.

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Posted: Sep 3rd, 2014
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Government raises UK bullshit threat level to ‘severe’

The UK’s bullshit threat level has been raised from ‘substantial’ to ‘severe’ meaning that the possibility of impending bullshit is highly likely.

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Posted: Sep 3rd, 2014
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