The Russian secret service, known these days as the FSB, says an internal inquiry has led them to conclude they’re killing people in unnecessarily fancy and showoffy ways. “I blame the James Bond films,” said spokesman Sergei Sonovabich today. [read...]
Police have confirmed that an employee of Lidl has been arrested in the ongoing investigation into the London Tube bomb attack. ‘Initially we thought it was a lone wolf but now it transpires that the bomber may have had assistance, [read...]
Now it’s like I’ve got to do the next week’s massacres up front to afford the time off, otherwise it just all piles up waiting for you for when you get back. I don’t know why they call it time off work – it’s work delayed or work brought forward more like. [read...]
There were calls for Westminster bridge to be named after Phillip Schofield last night after he made an audacious crossing to show defiance to Islamic extremists. The television personality and housewives’ favourite crossed the bridge with no regard for his own safety. [read...]
