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Posts Tagged ‘The Queen’

Queen now regrets agreeing to work the bank holiday

A spokesman explained that when she agreed to the engagements back in February, it ‘hadn’t clicked’ with ther that this was the 4-day weekend arranged in her honour. ‘Given that she’s worked here longer than most, Her Majesty feels she should get first dibs with the rota’ claimed an unnamed source.

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Posted: May 18th, 2012
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Palace launches Queen 2.0

But critics say they are disappointed that the new model looks exactly the same as Queen 1.0 except that it seems to be getting smaller.

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Posted: Mar 21st, 2012
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Duchess of Cambridge: ‘Thanks for the rules change, but we probably won’t be having kids’

Commonwealth leaders were said to be ‘disgruntled’ after Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge admitted that she and Prince William ‘aren’t really the parenty type, to be honest.’

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Posted: Oct 31st, 2011
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Queen’s spending falls by £1.8m after Palace officials close eBay account

‘We became suspicious when we noticed an ever greater volume of packages coming in and out of Buckingham Palace,’ said Sir Alan Reid, Keeper of the Privy Purse.

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Posted: Jul 6th, 2011
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Kate and Wills ‘doing up’ Kensington Palace to sell it on

‘Apparently the last person to live in this gaff was some single mother from Norfolk, so it needs quite a bit of work.’ said Kate, scratching her arse whilst brandishing a paint roller.

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Posted: Jun 9th, 2011
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