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Posts Tagged ‘trains’

Rail network achieves Grade II listed status

‘This exciting development will preserve the rail network in its present state for generations to come,’ said proud Transport Secretary, Patrick McLoughlin.

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Posted: Jul 31st, 2013
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Network Rail announce £37.5bn investment in replacement bus services

A £37.5bn plan to make rail travellers more comfortable by putting them all on buses has been announced by Network Rail. The plan will cover the five years up to 2019 and will see more trains than ever cancelled with passengers put on nice, comfy new buses instead.

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Posted: Jan 9th, 2013
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First-time buyers struggling to raise deposits for season tickets

An industry survey has revealed that almost half of prospective buyers believe it will take them seven years or more to raise the deposit they need to purchase a season ticket allowing them to travel to work by train.

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Posted: Dec 30th, 2012
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George Osborne: ‘my standard-class train terror’

Thank God Nadine Dorries wasn't aboard‘This was a chance to really muck in with hoi polloi. But as soon as I boarded the carriage I realised I’d made a frightful mistake.’

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Posted: Oct 19th, 2012
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Train suicide man delayed on journey to Heaven by live man on the rail

Shortly after his death Mr Rackly was heard to remark to his fellow travellers in the afterlife that the delay was ‘bloody typical’, that the live man on the rail showed ‘no consideration’ and that he would be ‘haunting his arse’.

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Posted: Apr 30th, 2012
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