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Posts Tagged ‘TV’

Special K women in court on suspicion of theft

A gang of beautiful women appeared in court today facing charges of theft and trespassing. The women of mixed origins were nabbed last week at a barn in Kent where Police found them feasting on their ill-gotten grains.

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Posted: Aug 6th, 2014
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DIY show does makeover for normal, healthy family

Viewers of a DIY makeover show were left a little bemused last night as they watched the transformation of a house occupied by a normal healthy family. John Thompson, 49, and his wife Debra and two children were the lucky recipients of some fairly costly renovations to their ‘tired-looking’ home.

‘The producers asked me on arrival if I’d lost a child recently or if any of them were terminally ill, or disabled, or had Down Syndrome, spina bifida, meningitis, leukaemia, eating disorders, a colostomy bag or were being bullied or just ugly. My boy had tonsilitis a few years back but other than that everyone is fine,’ said Mr Thompson.

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Posted: Jul 18th, 2014
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Britain celebrates 60 glorious years in front of the television

60 years on, this new-fangled invention has liberated us from the need to interact with any other human being

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Posted: Jun 3rd, 2014
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British Soap Awards wins Most Pointless Event in the Universe Award

Planet earth rejoiced last night after it was revealed the Intergalactic Federation had awarded the British Soap Awards the prize for Most Pointless Event in the Known Universe.

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Posted: May 21st, 2013
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BBC to make programme names brutally honest

A spokesperson for the BBC said that title changes already under consideration include replacing ‘Top Gear’ with ‘Three Big Kids Dicking Around in Cars’, and renaming ‘Coast’ to ‘Enthusiastic Scottish Man Waving His Arms Around’, whilst ‘EastEnders’ will almost certainly become ‘Moaning Gits Depressing Everyone to Death’.

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Posted: Nov 22nd, 2012
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